When I used to walk to my school, I thought anyone on the road using any sort of transport was being annoying. When I started riding a bicycle to the school, I thought anyone on the road using any sort of transport including the pedestrians but me (of course) was annoying. I drive a scooter these days and I think anyone on the road… never mind.

Don’t get me wrong though. I love riding a scooter, but during the monsoons, a two-wheeler is the last thing that I want to use for locomotion. The story of the ‘annual whammy for the two-wheeler riders‘ starts with the first showers. You are merrily riding with a song in your head and then suddenly feel some cold drops landing on you.

You first check if there was some ‘chariot’ that passed by carrying the Great Indian Painter (Spitter) that has decided to paint the town red (e.g: someone in a bus, a rickshaw, or an obnoxiously loud Bullet bike). But when you don’t find anyone like that and realize that these droplets of water have leaked from the heavens, you know you’ve enjoyed the summer for far too long.

With great shower, comes great liability – the raincoats. I’ve never liked raincoats and hence don’t own one. There are two types of raincoats – the gown type and the jacket-pants type. I absolutely hate the gown type because it basically makes you look like ‘Jadoo’ from ‘Koi Mil Gaya…’ who desperately needs ‘dhoop’ to feel better. And the jacket-pant type is no good because people ditch the pants and only wear the jacket. This definitely saves them from the embarrassment of putting on/taking off the pants in public but does no good as the part not covered with your jacket gets wet anyway.

The biggest problem two-wheeler riders face during the monsoons, though, is other vehicles splashing water on them! Also, it’s only during the monsoons that we realize that the mudguards for wheels are a scam.
After it has rained, the mud on the road, thrown tangentially by the wheels of other vehicles lands on us very conveniently, ruining our clothes and our mood. So that means we can’t even wear our favorite clothes and look good during the monsoons. Great!

Let’s take a moment to pity the people who wear glasses and have blurry vision while driving – thanks to the raindrops settling on their glasses.

A few days ago, I drove to my brother’s class to pick him up. I was waiting for him, sitting on the scooter when it suddenly started raining. Just after thinking of running to find a shelter, another thought came to my mind. I wasn’t a rain-hater when I was a kid. I loved getting drenched in the rain, feeling the cold raindrops and watching the lightning crack up the clouds in thunderous laughter. Muddy puddles were seen as an opportunity to play with mud and water together (my two favorite things as a child) as opposed to a “pool party of germs”.

I decided to enjoy the moment, reminiscing about the happiness that the rains had provided me as a child, to which I had turned blind over the years. I enjoyed that day immensely.

And then… I fell ill. I still hate the monsoons.